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comedy songs are never really funny
i find them to be nothing but a bore
you always know
just when the joke is coming
because the punchlines have to rhyme
with the line before
this is the part you’re supposed to laugh at hardest
but this chorus does nothing but disappoint
comedy songs don’t need a second verse
now it seems the song has gone on too long
so now I’m going to make you sing along
this is the part we sing together
this is the part we sing
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2. |
Fuck You, Simon
03:03
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i went on a tv show
it was a show that i don’t even like
because i thought it might be good
to be seen by seven million people
but i could not have been more wrong
cause simon cowell thinks i suck
heidi klum said i suck
the lady from modern family hates my guts
howie mandel didn’t seem to like me
but he didn’t hate me as much
as simon did
simon cowell really fucking hated me
well i hate him too
simon fuck you
what do you even do?
are you good at anything else
besides being a fucking prick?
simon cowell is there anyone in your life
who would say you’re a real nice guy?
even your wife can not pretend
because she used to be married
to your friend
until you had sex with her in their bed
i guess what i’m saying is
you would not do well on a talent show
whether you were judged
on your ability or character
you talentless piece of shit
heidi klum your fame has waned
your career has seen much better days
lady from modern family
i don’t even know your name
howie mandel you were big in the 80s
for putting a rubber glove on your face
and blowing air into it
that is the funniest thing you’ve ever done
simon cowell you can go get fucked
heidi klum i think you suck
lady from modern family
i still don’t even know your name
howie mandel you can eat some shit
take your rubber glove and choke on it
you haven’t been remotely relevant
since 1988
none of you have talent
so what the hell do you know?
americas got more talent
than the judges on the show
thank you good night
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