1. |
Anxiety Man
01:18
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I'm a powerful superhero
My only weakness is everything
My arch nemesis is human interaction
That's because I am
Anxiety Man
My mind races faster than a speeding bullet
Panic more powerful than a locomotive
Able to leap to conclusions in a single bound
And I don't do well in crowds
I'm a hero paralyzed by fear
So who's going to rescue me
I need a trusty sidekick to take it from here
Oh look, there he is now
It's Depression Boy
It looks like my work here is done
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2. |
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I just wanna have fun with you
The world is such an ugly place
So let’s pay no attention to the news
Ignorance is a beautiful thing
Let's fall in love and ride a bicycle for two
Democracy is collapsing in the USA
So tonight we’re only thinkin’
'bout you and me
I wanna ignore reality with you
Social media is selling all our private information
And big brother's always watching you
The government is controlled
By evil corporations
And they all wanna make a profit from you
I don’t even wanna vote
For the next president
And i don’t wanna go to work
So i can pay my rent
Cause i just wanna have fun with you
Climate change is melting
All the polar ice caps
And you look so pretty in that dress
All the bees are going extinct
I think I'll make you a mixtape on cassette
Mass shootings are happening every day
So lets go and get some matching heart tattoos
A nuclear war is just days away
So i just wanna have some fun
Since we’re doomed
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3. |
The Good Samaritan
01:01
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The other day
I did something nice for somebody
And I didn't tell anyone
Or brag about it
So, I wrote a song about it
I held the door open for you
Right as you were coming out of the Burger King
I never told a soul what happened on that day
That makes me a hero
I'm so great
You did not say, "thank you"
So I looked you in the eyes
I said, "I hope you die
choke on chicken fries
Don't even try to thank me now
Drop dead Good bye"
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4. |
Pizza Delivery Robot
01:42
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I want take out
But the pizza guy makes me wait
But in the future
Humans will be replaced
And robots will work
At the pizza place
Pizza delivery robot
At you door, but
Pizza delivery robots
Are pure evil to the core
Technology is pretty nice
But we will pay the price for
Delivery robots
Now I get pizza
Delivered by androids
But I am lonely, cause
All my friends have been destroyed
By pizza deliver robots
Run and hide
Pizza delivery robots
Pepperoni right before we die
They'll erase the human race
In thirty minutes or less
Delivery robots
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5. |
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HOME IS WHERE THERE HEART IS
Sometimes I like to stand alone in the corner because it feels like the walls are hugging me and they're loving me, as we're snuggling but now it's really bugging me as I'm struggling while wondering, "What are we becoming? Am I in love with my walls?" They say, "Home is where the heart is," so I'm looking for a one bedroom apartment, inside my chest. I can't have guests sleep on the couch, I guess, and that makes me depressed. So I got into an argument and I tore down all my walls. My heart must part with which it is connected and that's what makes me an artist. It's what makes me the smartest. I'm also modest, I promise, I'm flawless and if I'm being honest, I'm the male version of a goddess. And I talk solace in all this. I'm astonished that I am not a narcissist, even though I know it all
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6. |
Disappear
00:53
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There's a new dance that's out of sight
And you can do it in the morning
You can do it late at night
If you can move at the speed of light
You can do it without warning
You can do it out of spite
Now disappear
Into thin air
Uh oh, where I am?
Where did I go?
How do I get back?
Nobody knows
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7. |
Atheist, Alone
01:08
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As a boy I prayed every night
I prayed that everything would be alright
I prayed that one day I would find a wife
And it would be so lovely
As I grew up, love was a battle zone
I felt like my prayers were being postponed
So now I am and atheist, alone
Not even god loves me
So now I'm having sex with other atheists
From the internet, to feel fulfilled
But even people who've found god
Use the internet to get a thrill
And I wonder if people on Christian Mingle
Say, "Bible Verse and chill"
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8. |
What Am I Doing?
01:33
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What am I doing?
Oh god, this is crazy
I can not believe I'm even contemplating
Falling in love with anyone
But right now it's like my brain has a mind of its own
I wonder if you're thinking of our future together
Together forever seems like such an adventure
No pressure, but our wedding is next week,
But whatever
What should we name our kids?
Cause we're having thirteen
Marry me
and we'll be eternally enemies
Even though we got married seconds ago
We never go anywhere nice anymore
And I hate the way you sound when you chew your food
Even though we haven't chewed food since we said our vows
The honeymoon hasn't even started yet
But it feels like it's already over
Because ever since we tied the knot, it feels like
It has been tied tightly around my throat
Divorce me please
And let's split our equity
And never speak
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9. |
4000 Dollars
02:09
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I've been by your side for a while
And I just think you're grand
There's only one thing you don't have
That my ex girlfriend has
Cause she took my 4000 dollars
When she walked right out the door
She took my 4000 dollars
And she asked for 200 more
If I had my money now
We'd be living the good life
Instead, we're eating cat food
Spread on crackers with a knife
She borrowed 4000 dollars
When we were very much in love
She had a change of heart
But has thousands of dollars
That she's undeserving of
Before she left, she said that
It would be just a loan
But then she left, and it turned out
It was me who was alone
So can I borrow 4000 Dollars from you
I know it is a lot to ask
But you know I'm always true
So darling can you help me out
Cause I need money too
And if my ex girlfriend ever pays me back
I will give it all to you
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10. |
Gone, Gone, Gone
01:36
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We are so far from where we
used to be, when there was
less distance, so our closeness
is now few and far between
It's plain to see, we're both
in very different places
cause I'm in Nashville
you're in Ridgewood Queens
I'm sorry I forgot to mention
I was leaving to go on tour
but I didn't think
you'd notice anyway
What's the big deal it's only
been seventeen months
since I have called or since
the last time the rent was paid
Now you're gone, gone, gone
since you've gone, gone, gone
Actually it is me who is gone
cause I'm out here
on the road
Is our landlord angry at me
I can not afford to lose
the both of you, because, well
for starters your name is on
the lease. And the landlord never
asked for a credit check or proof of
income. Where will I ever find
another landlord quite like
Maurice? I know you can't afford
my half of the rent but I promise
I'll pay you back but right now
the tour is going unsuccessfully
The show in Cleveland never paid
and in Memphis no one even came
but I think I'll make the rent eventually
But still you're gone, gone, gone
Evicted at dawn,
forced to move on.
And also me, I am gone
forever touring on the road
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11. |
Elephant Shoes
01:15
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Elephant shoes
filled with olive juice
I spilled it. I love you
But you did not say it too
The second that I said it
all my troubles began
I guess I probably
should have waited for
this airplane to land
Now we're stuck here
Up in the air, hoping
for a plane crash. But
then I think I thought
that maybe she did not
hear me, so I decided
to repeat myself more
clearly, so I leaned in
but then she said,
"Oh, I think you're nice,
but please don't say
it twice." But I did
Elephant shoes
filled with olive juice
I spilled it. I love you
Guess I blew it
Now where are you?
You had a parachute
It's a good thing
I have one too
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12. |
Love At First Sight
06:05
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There is none greater in
the world than true love
True love is true and it fits
like a glove. It's honest
and deep, perhaps sent
from above. True love is
more pure than the whitest
white dove. I knew it when
I first laid eyes on she
Me in a coffee shop
ordering tea. She, the
barista so full of glee
Her name tag said,
"Hello my name is Bree."
"What would you like,"
she asked, looking ahead
I said, "Your hand in
marriage with you I thee
wed, but if you decline
which I must say I dread
I'll have a green tea in a
small cup instead."
Bree looked displeased
and she gave me a sneer. I
stepped aside, trying to
disappear "It was not
meant to be," I said, inside
my head. Well my proposal is
denied, and she wishes me dead
I sat with my tea and then what did I see? The most
beautiful woman I had seen, since Bree. She was
drinking her coffee, as black as the night. As black as
my heart felt since Bree and my fight. I wonder if her
name is pretty as she. I wonder if her name might
somehow be Bree. For I already had a tattoo on my
chest. It said, "Bree 4ever," but now I'm bereft. So if
she's named Bree, that would be most convenient for me
Well I sat down beside her and too my dismay she
looked unhappy, as if trying to say, "Hey okay, I must
convey that you can not stay with me in this cafe
Nay! I say, I won't betray. I have a fiancé and he's on
his way." Then in walked a man with a funny toupee.
Mr. Fiancé, his name was Ray. I knew that my
welcome had been overstayed. He asked me to leave or
hell I would pay. With no delay he gave me a punch,
and I spilled all my tea on his lady's lunch. I quickly
obeyed and I stood and I said, "I'll be on my way, and
good day," to the bunch. I left with a slink, and I cried
cause I knew it was not meant to be with girl number
two. No one, not me, not a god could foresee that I was
about to meet girl number three. I opened the door to
make a quick leave and an angel appeared and I felt so
relieved. I held the door open for her to walk in and
then I proposed, "Oh where have you been? All of my
life I've waited for thee and I finally found you, now
please marry me." Without even stopping, she said,
"Please concede. Please do not beg and please do not
plead," and then my heart sunk as I looked at her go.
I could not believe my success was so low. She was the
latest, the third in a row, but when feelings of woe come
I go with the flow. I walked to the bus stop and when it was there. I stepped up the steps but I had not the fare. I had
only one half of the regular price but the driver was pretty
and witty and nice. She said, "You can step in, honey that
will suffice." And I thanked her and said, "Now I'll be precise
I want you to know that I've known from the start that you
drive the bus, the one in my heart," and then she gave me a
look and then yelled, "Take a seat!" and I did as she asked
and admitted defeat. The ride it was long and I felt
incomplete. I was beat, I repeat, so I made my retreat. When
I got home I felt quite depressed. So I sat and I thought
while I took a long rest. I thought it best to sit back and asses
where I went wrong it was anyone's guess. Obsessed and
distressed I've become on my quest and my poor little heart
it was put to the test. So lest, I attest to invest in such zest
I turned to a pest, when my love I professed. And so I digress
none the less, from this stress. They say love is the best, so
I feel no regrets. I am blessed more this mess, I am blessed
to excess and I already can't wait to see who I'll meet next
My question to you, "Do you think that it's strange finding
true love in this day and age?"I seem to find love fifty times in
a day. I'm a romantic. What can I say?
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13. |
Hipster Jesus
01:51
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14. |
Vote Or Die
00:56
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15. |
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16. |
Dalai Lama Sonata
01:13
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17. |
Seven Days
00:56
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